There are times when the way I say something sounds like a command to my husband’s ears, even when I don’t intend it that way. I’m learning that it often works best if I can change it from a statement to a question. Here are a few examples:
Instead of “We should…” say, “Do you think we should…?”
Instead of “You could put it over there,” say, “Would you like to put it over there?”
Instead of “I need your help with…” say, “Would you be willing to help me with…?”
If it sounds to a man like were telling him what to do, we may meet with some resistance. But if they feel like we respect their opinions and feelings, they tend to be more open to what we have to say.